You already know that people's maudlin problem-laden blogs creep me out. Speaking for myself, posts about people's lifestyles also annoy the cocktail sauce out of me. You know what I mean—the ones about weight loss, green living and the like. Now, don't get in a twist. Hear me out. I realize that these blogs are kept for a reason. Two reasons, in fact: (A) informing readers about useful tips if they want to go green or lose the pounds, and (B) as a sort of self-policing diary for the writer. Those are good reasons. Like I said, my sense of umbrage isn't always logical.
That having been said, if you're anything like me, you're about to be annoyed.
I am pleased to announce that I have made some much-needed changes in my lifestyle. First and foremost, I am actually writing every day now.
It's true! You remember all those posts I wrote about how hard it was to establish a writing routine? How difficult it was to get into the writing mood every day? Well, I put my shoulder to the wheel and forced myself to do it. I started bringing my computer to work every day and trying to write during my breaks. It was tough at first, but it got easier. Soon, I had conditioned myself to get into the writing mood—to turn on the creativity—within seconds of opening MS Word and gazing over the pages of my manuscript.
It's an absolute blast. I've gotten over the shoal water (as Mark Twain would say) and am floating along pretty easily through the chapters that I'm adding. This manuscript has gone from twelve chapters, 296 pages and 58,404 words to twenty-one chapters, 436 pages and 90,106 words—and three of those chapters haven't even been written yet. I estimate the work's final length at 120-130,000 words...twice the size of the first draft.
Awesomeness.
And so, I've managed to overhaul the writing aspects of my life. Excellent. Nice work there, Postie. But it's not enough. There are other matters which also require my attention. As a follow-up, I've decided to focus on something that desperately needs improvement: my level of physical activity. I just read an article on the BBC which frankly disturbed me. Apparently the sedentary lifestyle—sitting around for hours and hours instead of exercising—is a killer. Literally. It zonks 5.3 million people a year, as many as do smoking-related health problems.
Yikes.
I don't want to be a statistic. I'd rather live to a ripe old age, which I'll have to if I want to publish all of the planned twenty-one books in this novel series, and continue to decry anthropic technological obsession for decades to come. Moreover, I'm sick of being doughy. I'd like to be in good enough shape to battle a charging Minotaur, hold on to a bucking Pteranodon, or outrun a zombie. One should always be ready for anything, physically and mentally.
So I've decided to make a change. A link provided within the BBC article explained that a mere 150 minutes of moderate physical activity per week is just what the doctor ordered. In addition, one should do muscle-strengthening exercises like push-ups, sit-ups, or yoga two days a week.
Heck, that's nothing. I've no excuse for not doing at least that much. I don't need to be running marathons. I just need to get off my heinie.
In the manner of an annoyingly self-righteous fitness blog, I shall now tell you my new workout routine. This is less for your illumination and more for my own lack of willpower. The following will serve as a public statement, made on the record, which I must hereafter cleave to or face public denouncement.
And so, without further ado, the new era begins. I'm playing an hour or two of basketball with my fellow expats at 5 p.m. this evening in Gyeyang Park. Now that summer intensives are here, and our schedules at work have been changed from 2-10 p.m. to 9 a.m.-5:30 p.m., I have double incentive. I'll have cool evenings to exercise in for the next three weeks. I have a beat-up old bike sitting out in the corridor, which I have failed to employ on a regular basis. I shall start taking evening bike rides. When summer intensives come to an end, I'll ride my bike whenever I can, and walk 30 minutes in the mornings. I shall supplement this with push-ups and sit-ups, with which I am intimately familiar already.
I shall fear neither heat nor humidity. I shall hydrate regularly. I shall ignore all but the most life-threatening aches and pains. My will is set. Only death can break it.
If the fitness regime sticks, my finances will be the final frontier.
Postie out...
Who's the hero in this picture, the guy who sits around all day, or Race Bannon? |
2 comments:
The hero in that picture is actually not the guy who sits or Race Banner, unless Race Banner is the guy with the beard. He's the hero. I know that because he's got the beard, that makes him at least 68.3% more manly [Citation Needed].
"That guy with the beard"? Are you telling me you don't recognize Dr. Quest?
And actually, we're both wrong. The hero of that show was actually the titular character, Dr. Quest's son, Jonny.
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